December, 02 2003

I met Paul Croxen on my first night at the NSW Institute of Technology, way back in 1987. There were four of us: Paul and David had cadetships with the NSW TAB, while Carolyn and I had a cadetships with St. George Building Society. Our cadetships combined full-time, on-the-job training with part-time study for two years, followed by two more years of full-time study. We called ourselves “space cadets” and have been friends ever since—seventeen years.

Sadly, Paul died last Wednesday.

Here are some things I remember about Paul:

• Paul was a country boy. When I first met him, he spoke with the casual, slow-paced delivery that is typical of Northern NSW. Over the years, took on more of a city accent, but whenever he reminisced about growing up Taree, his voice would slow to a drawl.

• Paul taught me good Aussie expressions such as “Flat out like a lizard drinking,” and “Off like a bucket of prawns in the sun.” Even in fourth year, he could still catch me off-guard with an expresson I hadn’t heard before.

• Paul introduced me to The Proclaimers and Bon Jovi.

• Paul had a real 1200/75 baud modem on his Commodore-64. I was impressed. The modem was connected by a funny little PCB sticking out the back of the C-64’s expansion slot. One night we got a list of BBSes in Sydney and dialed into a few. Sometime around 12:00am, we were having trouble connecting on one particular number, so I dialed it on the phone and got an earful from some poor bloke I had woken. While I stammered through an apology, Paul was urgently dispensing the most sensible advice, “Hang up! Hang up!”.

• Paul managed to be brainy, hard-working and likeable all at the same time. Us four space cadets did our group-assignments together, and, unlike myself, Paul was a perfect team member. IIRC, Paul graduated third in our year.

• Paul liked to stay abreast of current affairs and to do the Right Thing. When the issue of plastic bags killing marine life was first raised in the media, Paul immediately set about buying less plastic, using fewer shopping bags and even chopping up the troublesome plastic rings that come on 2 litre milk bottle caps.

• Paul met Kylie. One Monday, I asked Paul how his weekend was. He said, “Oh, good, I went to a party,” but his flat mate interjected with the news that Paul had met a girl, and spent several hours alone in the bedroom with her. “We were just talking!,” Paul protested. After a little ribbing he admitted that there were, perhaps, hands on knees. It was all so very sweet.

• Paul was the first among the four of us to have children. He did a really good job of it, too: twin girls! Later came a boy, and he cherished all three of his children.